


Emotions

by gl1tchedshad0ws



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Anger, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blood, Coin Flipping, Connor Deserves Happiness, Cooking, Drabble Collection, Fear, Hank Anderson & Connor Parent-Child Relationship, Hank Being Awesome, Hospitalized, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Memories, Panic Attack, Sadness, gratitude, joy, short but sweet, shutdown
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-14
Updated: 2018-07-11
Packaged: 2019-05-23 07:33:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14929928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gl1tchedshad0ws/pseuds/gl1tchedshad0ws
Summary: Connor, an RK800 unit, was supposed to serve and follow orders. After the android rebellion, androids are now on equal terms with the humans, with laws and rights. With every coming day, he is learning more and more how to be human. Emotions were essential to a human being.





	1. Sadness

There was harsh coughing. Hank was vomiting again.

Connor stared at Sumo, the dog staring back at him as it lied on the floor, his tail thumping softly. The android smiled and gave the dog a gentle stroke, his hand running along its side. He repeated this motion, ignoring the Lieutenant hacking behind the scenes. 

It was always this. Hank drinking himself to death almost, then running into the bathroom to vomit. Connor tasted the liquor once, his systems warning about the harsh chemicals within this drink plus also being greeted by a slightly bitter taste. He couldn’t understand why Hank liked this stuff, why he was so determined to kill himself. He asked before how this all started, and the only answer he was given was Hank “couldn’t escape” and that it “keeps coming back.” 

He heard the toilet flush and looked towards the hall leading to the bathroom, hearing the man’s familiar mumbles and sniffles as he exited. He came back, his face flushed and his shirt having slight splotches of vomit on it. He reeked of booze. And then, he sat down on the couch, as gently as he could, and yet still flinched when he was comfortable. Connor merely stared, before giving the dog a pat and standing up. 

“Are you alright, lieutenant?” He asked, sitting next to him and eyeing him closely. 

Hank rubbed his face with the back of his hand. “Yeah… I’m fine…”

Connor merely frowned. “You know that’s bad for your health, Lieutenant.”

Hank merely shrugged. “That’s the idea… I’ll just waste away into nothing…”

Connor blinked at him. He always wondered where Hank’s depression came from. Was it from the loss of his son? Or maybe his father? HIs father… Hank never talked much about his father. The only few times he ever spoke of him was while he was completely wasted, either drowning in his own tears or ranting in an angry manner. It only made Connor wondered… Who was Hank’s father? 

“Lieutenant?” He asked. “Is it okay if I can ask you a personal question?”

Hank merely glared at him. “Why the fuck do you ask so many questions?”

Connor merely stared back at him, his glare not causing any reaction. “I’m simply trying to understand things, Lieutenant.”

Hank sighed and looked down. “Fine… What is it?”

“Who was your father?”

Hank glared at him once more. “He was a prick.”

“Well… What I mean to ask is…” Connor began. “When did this addiction start?” 

Hank blinked. “What…? My drinking habit?”

Connor nodded, an eagerness beginning to wash over him like a tidal wave. Hank sighed again, running a hand through his hair. His face was flushed, his hands were slightly shaking. It only made Connor eye him more closely, finding any sort of indicator he might vomit again or have any sickness trait at all. 

“You already know about Cole.” Hank started. “You know when he died and how he died and… That day I couldn’t bare the thought of my son being gone. I felt like a part of me was gone, just like when my father left.”

Connor took this piece of information in. His father left. What did he mean by leave? Can parents do that? Just pack their bags and leave their children behind without a damn in the world? It only reminded him of Amanda and how sudden she turned her back on him, after all the months he spent thinking she trusted him. This shouldn’t bother him and yet, deep down, it did. It was a thorn in his side, a reminder that he failed his mission.

He related to this. 

“They divorced. My father and mother use to argue a lot and I would never understand why. Sometimes, marriages don’t work out.” Hank said. 

“Did you have a wife?” Connor asked. 

“I did… But we divorced, just as my parents did. I think Cole was still a baby when we divorced… Where the hell do you think Cole came from?!” 

Connor smiled awkwardly and looked down, still listening. 

“I never heard from that bitch again, nothing to me or my boy.” Hank sighed. “It’s like she vanished off the face of the planet for fuck sake! I still had my boy and that’s all that mattered to me! Then I had to deal with the divorce papers and child support and… It was just a fucking mess. Now, Cole is dead and I got nothing left.”

Connor merely stared at nothing, his head low. He felt something swell within him, an emotion he never felt before. He thought of Amanda, how she always looked at him as a pupil, something she was proud of. Then, the next minute, she was gone, vanishing into the blizzard where he met her during the android rebellion. She left him there to die, to ultimately freeze. He couldn’t understand why she left, he even heard of a new model who now strides by her side, hence taking his place. He hasn’t seen her since ever since he helped in the android rebellion and it didn’t help when now all androids should be on equal terms with humans, in-laws, and in freedom. He was supposed to follow orders but he betrayed her in the end and now he was supposedly an equal to humans. She had every right to leave, didn’t she? Just as Hank’s father and wife left him too. 

He’s a deviant.

A filthy deviant. 

Maybe Hank was too. 

He just couldn’t understand.

This feeling only grew liquid beginning to leak from his eyes. His LED began to darken, his familiar light blue beginning to shift into a more darker tone. He couldn’t understand. He wasn’t human. He was a machine. And yet, he wanted to feel this way. He wanted to be human. He wanted Amanda to be proud of him but he always knew she was disappointed in him, even when he was being as honest as he could. Tears began to stream down his cheeks, his thoughts began to unfold themselves.

He was sad. 

“Do I make you happy, Lieutenant?” He croaked out, his throat tightening. Why was he asking this? He shouldn’t be asking something like that. “What am I doing?”

Hank sat up, his eyes widening at the sight unfolding in front of him. Then, he held the android’s shoulders, trying to hold the weeping android in place. He never saw Connor cry before, and to be honest, it was making him worried. Imagine that, Hank Anderson was worried for a piece of plastic. “Connor…?”

“Why do I feel this way? Why do I miss Amanda?” Connor said, his voice wavering. 

“Because you miss her, that’s why,” Hank said, his voice calm and reassuring. “You're showing human emotions, Connor. You're sad.”

“Sad?” This only made him cry harder, his cries spilling out of him like bile. “I miss her so much…! Why did she leave me? I don’t understand!”

Hank pulled him into a hug, his arms feeling strong around his frail body. He couldn’t control this, he couldn’t control his ugly sobs. Even Sumo came over, sitting near them and licking its snout. Connor spilled his thoughts out, mixed in with his cries. 

“I can’t understand. I’m not human. I wish I was human. I want to feel. I want to understand.”

It all came out in a garbled mess. Ans Hank sat there, holding the trembling android in his arms, listening.

O0O

Eventually, Connor stopped crying. 

He laid on his side, his head on Hank’s lap, his LED a mix of light blue and dark. His face was as flushed as Hank’s was after his latest vomit, his cheeks drying from the tears he shed. Now, his mind was empty, all of his thoughts were now out in the open. Hank hasn’t said anything to him, he only waited for him to settle before he spoke up. 

“So, who’s Amanda anyway?”

Connor just kept staring at the television, watching the basketball players dribble the ball back and forth across the court. “She was my handler. I went to give visit her after our investigations.”

“Riiiiight…” Hank sighed. “Well, you don’t have to worry about her anymore, I guess…” 

Connor only looked at him. “It’s hard for me to stop thinking about her, Lieutenant. She was the first face I ever saw when I woke up back at Cyberlife.”

“Why do you think I drink, Connor? I drink to forget, but the thoughts always come back.” Hank replied back, stroking Connor’s hair. “Guess we both got something in common…”

Connor smiled a bit. He was glad he showed a human emotion. For once, he didn’t think he was a deviant. For once, he didn’t feel guilty about opening up. 

He felt human.

“Hey, Hank…?” He asked.

“Hmm?”

“Thanks for putting up with me.”

“Well, I wouldn’t say putting up with you would be the right term.”

“Then what is?”

Hank patted Sumo as the dog’s head perched on the side of the couch. “It’s more of I got used to your company. It’s not too bad having an android around, especially for a sick fuck like me.”

Connor’s smile only grew wider and he closed his eyes, the sound of thunder rumbling in the distance. It was going to rain. Connor loved rain.

“Thanks, Lieutenant.”


	2. Fear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hank gets shot and all Connor can do was wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to say thank you all so much for all the love for this fanfic already!  
> Love yall lots~! <333

Blood coated Connor’s hand as he held onto Hank’s wound. Hank’s breathing was ragged, a trail of blood staining his beard. He was caught in red and blue flashing lights, officers shouting commands and beginning to swarm. 

The fugitive got away but shot Hank in the process. 

Connor could only hold him, calling for help as he tried to stop the bleeding. The bleeding was coming from his side, the bullet piercing through him and staining his undershirt red. He has already called for an ambulance but he felt the urge to call again and scream. Scream at them that his lieutenant was bleeding out and could be possibly dying in his arms. 

“You’re gonna be okay, Lieutenant! I need for you to stay with me!” Connor said, trying to keep his voice steady as he held onto his wound. 

Hank coughed, blood splotching his beard. “I’m fine, Connor… I’m… Fucking Christ…” 

“No… Try not to move…” Connor said. “Your gonna be okay…”

He was going to be okay.  
He was going to be fine.  
Sure, the fugitive got away, but that’s okay! You can't catch every criminal in the world, right?  
Right?

A siren echoed from afar and an ambulance soon pulled up. Hank was lifted into the back and with the doors slamming behind him, Connor was left alone to watch him drive away, his hand still coated in his lieutenant's blood.

O0O 

He sat motionless, his hands intertwined together (washed of course), waiting for the diagnostic of his lieutenant. The clock ticked in the distance, and every tick only drew Connor further and further into his own mind. He didn’t know how long it’s been, he only cared about his lieutenant being okay. It’s all he wanted. He imagined Hank to walk out, standing perfectly straight with his beard red-free, and with that familiar smirk. Connor wanted to hear him say, “Let’s find that fucker.” and go off to find the suspect in question.

It didn’t help Connor at all. The suspect was already found and taken into custody after a standoff, which was fine by him, but Hank was hurt. He wasn’t sure if he would make it. Could he make it? Will he make it? He knew Hank was old. He shook his head. 

_No… Don’t think like that!_

He sighed, tightening the grip of his intertwined hands. He can only sit and wait and he never thought this would be the hardest part. He didn’t have a problem with it before so… Why now? Why was he suppressing the urge to bust down the doors and search for his lieutenant? Why was he suppressing the urge to DEMAND that he must see Hank? He was never antsy before, he was never fighting the urge to get up and disobey what he was ordered to do (well, he IS a deviant but still! he was in a hospital for fuck sake!). He was worried. 

He was scared.

Connor’s mind suddenly plummeted. He couldn’t protect Hank. He couldn’t help him. He couldn’t save him. This was all his fault. If he didn’t startle that damn fugitive-! He let go of his hands and began to run them on his legs, looking up and looking all around. He noticed the other people and androids waiting. Some reading magazines or watching the television while other dozed off into space or was asleep. It didn’t help his mental state at all.

_I couldn’t save him,_  
_He’s going to die because of me!_  
_I’m sorry._  
_I’m sorry._  
_I’m sorry, Hank.  
_ _I’m so sorry._

His breathing increased, tears beginning to fill his eyes, and the android leaned over, his elbows on his legs. His LED flashed from a darkened blue to an instant purple, now flashing at a rapid pace. His pupils dilated and his voice was trapped in his throat, ensnared like a fly in a web. 

_I’m sorry._  
_I’m sorry._  
_I’m sorry._  
_I’m sorry._  
_I’m sorry._  
_I’m sorry.  
_ _I’m sorry._

Connor couldn’t move. He can’t move. He was shaking. He was crying. His hands gripped at his hair. What was wrong? Why was he stuck? Why can’t he move? Why can’t he speak? Why can’t he do anything? He was frozen in place. He was trapped. 

He slammed his eyes shut, spiraling into a crying fit, his throat tightening as a soft sob escaped him. He could have done more, he should have done more! He was terrified of losing Hank, his friend, his partner, and his father figure. He wouldn't be able to bare it…!

“Hey… Buddy…”

He suddenly felt warmth wrap around his hands and Connor’s eyes flashed open. He didn’t see Hank at all like he hoped but he was surprised to see Gavin kneeling before him, his hands locked in his own.

“D-Detective Reed…” Connor mumbled, shaking slightly.

“I need to you try to relax,” Gavin said, his voice surprisingly calm. “Hank is going to be okay.”

“Hank is going to be okay…” Connor repeated, his voice shaky. 

“Yeah… Now, I need you to follow what I do, okay?” Gavin inhaled. “Take a deep breath…”

Connor followed his movements, inhaling a huge gulp of air, his inhalation shaky as well.

“Now, let it out…” Gavin sighed and Connor followed him. They repeated this for a few moments, Connor’s LED went from blinking purple too now is a mix of purple and blue. 

_In and out…_  
_In and out….  
_ _In and out…_

His worries began to lift, his mind beginning to clear, his emotional state returning to normal. Hank was going to be okay. Hank was going to be okay…

But why was Gavin helping him? Didn’t he hate androids to the bitter core? Why was he being so nice to him? 

“You alright?” Gavin asked.

Connor only nodded. Gavin patted his hands and sat next to him, leaning back in his seat and putting his hands behind his head. They both sat there in silence until Gavin spoke. 

“I didn’t think an android would have a panic attack like that…” 

Connor looked at him, running the back of his hand to wipe the tears from his cheeks. 

“You were scared, huh…?” He asked and Connor nodded. He only nodded slightly, taking this information in. “...Maybe… You are human after all?”

Gavin suddenly sighed, blushing. “Whatever, just, I’m glad you're okay!”

Connor smiled a little. He knew what he was trying to say and he accepted it as such. He folded his hands again and took a deep breath, now closing his eyes and counting down the minutes until he could see Hank. 

“Thank you, Detective Reed.”

O0O 

Being escorted to Hank’s room, Connor rushed in after seeing his familiar face and gave him a hug, much to Hank’s dismay.

“H-Hey Connor. O-ow… Can you loosen up a bit!”

“Sorry, Lieutenant…”

Connor sniffled, tears threatening to fall as he loosened his grip. “I’m so glad you're okay, lieutenant!”

Hank shrugged, struggling to sit up. “Ehh… Same shit, new day…”

Connor smiled wide. He missed his voice, he missed his “not give a fuck” attitude. He missed him. He was so glad he was alright and yet... He felt ashamed he couldn't do more. He looked down. 

“What’s the matter? I bore you already?” He heard Hank ask and he shook his head. “Then what is it?”

Connor took a deep breath and looked up at him. “I was scared…”

Hank blinked and continued to listen.

“I was scared of losing you, Lieutenant, I knew I should have done more but I couldn’t... “ He said.

_I thought you were going to die._

“No... Connor... You did everything you could. I'm grateful for you being by my side but you must remember, that’s what happens when you are a police officer, Connor. Being shot isn’t a big deal for me… Well, not anymore. Criminals have shot me before.” 

_But it is a big deal, I could have lost you._

Connor shook his head. “I was terrified, Hank! I-I… I can’t explain but I… I lost myself in the waiting room.”

_A panic attack, was it?_

“You… lost yourself?” Hank raised an eyebrow. 

Connor nodded. “Detective Reed was there and he helped me calm down but I… I was so scared of losing you… Gavin told me it was a panic attack.”

“Really? GAVIN helped you? For fuck sake, is everyone turning a new leaf?!” 

“I-I don’t know but… I’m so glad you're alright, Lieutenant.”

Connor hugged him again (gently this time), the tears threatening to fall again. Hank was okay. Detective Reed was right. Hank was okay. 

All he had to do, was breathe. _Noted: Thank Detective Reed formally when he sees him again._

"Are you okay, son?"

 

"I'm fine now... It was... It was so much..."

"You can tell me? I'll listen."

"Thanks, Lietenant."


	3. Anger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor gets angry one day.

Connor was always aware of what they said. It was always the same things, plastic, a toy, a fucking android, he heard them all. He would always stand there, unfazed by their threats. He would always stare at them as if they expected anything to happen anyway. Hank used to say all these nasty things to him, but after a series of unfortunate events, the two were now partners. Hank didn’t see him as a piece of plastic, he saw him as his partner, his trainee, perhaps even his son (connor liked to think of it that way).

But something poked at Connor today, deep down something drove him crazy. He couldn’t put his finger on it and it only stressed him more.

O0O 

It was another busy day at the police station. Hank and Connor sat at their desks, looking through files of the suspects they want to investigate. But Connor simply sat there, staring at his hands. He closed them, squeezing them tightly, then opening them. Something was bothering him, clearly, but what was it? Why was he trying to figure it out? Why did this frustrate him? He ran a self-diagnostic so many times, trying to correct it, but it didn’t correct itself. It’s still there, lingering. What the fuck could possibly be on his mind?!

“You alright?”

Connor blinked and glanced at Hank, who was staring at him. Clearing his throat, he said, “I’m alright, Lieutenant.”

Hank raised an eyebrow before he glanced back at his monitor, not speaking anymore. Connor tried to do the same, his movements stiff with an aggressive fix of his tie. Why was he like this? This morning, everything was fine. They arrived and sat down, an hour going by of their day. But this next hour drove Connor up a wall. A sudden drive like this only made him run another diagnostic (his system should have worn out by now). Still nothing, no problems with him. It only made him grind his teeth out of pure… Frustration?

“Lieutenant Anderson!”

The chief’s call made Connor jump and he glanced at the chief. 

“In my office.” 

Hank sighed. “Fucking hell… I’ll be back, Connor.”

Hank got up and sluggishly moved up the steps into his office, the glass door closing behind them both. Connor was alone. He looked down the feeling deep within only poking at him harder. Maybe a walk around the office would clear his head? Maybe calm down whatever was poking at him. Connor got up, more quickly then he wanted to, and scooted out of his desk, slamming the chair into his desk a bit too hard. It made a clang and he steadied it quickly. 

He needed a drink. 

Quickly making his way to the break room, he slammed the coffee cup under the coffee maker and turned on the brew. A normal black coffee. Connor hated coffee. What was he doing? The feeling didn’t go away. Fucking hell.

Plastic prick. 

There it was, another jab at him. Straining his ears at the coffee finally finished brewing, he took the cup off the coffee maker and set it down on the table.

Get me a coffee, dipshit.

Another jab. Maybe this was what’s been on his mind all day? These taunts, these aggressive names? He didn’t understand. He wanted to understand. Why did they call him a toy? Why did they call him all these nasty things? Even then, it’s still happening. Toy, a piece of plastic, you name it. He heard them all. And yet, it seemed as if his system was starting to catch on to these threats as if an emotion was inbound. 

Something was bound to happen.

“Hey, plastic fuck.”

Connor glanced at the voice, his eyes dilating. It was an officer, along with a partner of his own. He took note of how plump this officer was and it only made him bite his tongue from saying anything rude. 

“Move it.” The officer demanded. 

Connor didn’t move, instead, he was stood there, glaring. The officer wasn’t fazed. Instead, the human came forward and shoved him aside, unfazed by his glare. “I said, move it!”

The physical contact broke whatever patient he had. The cup in his hands slipping, splashing all over him as he collided with the floor. Heat seared on his skin and the android’s LED started blinking red. His suit was ruined. His skin was hot. His eyes stung. He wasn't a plastic fuck. He wasn’t a toy. His name was Connor.

He got up, his LED glowing a strong red. “My name is Connor.”

The officer looked at him. “What?”

“I said my name is Connor.” Connor’s voice was hard but that didn’t faze the officer, in fact, it made him scoff.

“Get the hell out of my face.” 

“I only take orders from Lieutenant Anderson! Don’t talk to me like I’m some kind of… FUCKING MACHINE!”

His voice risen higher then he hoped and from behind him, a couple of detectives and officers turned their heads to his voice. He didn’t realize it, but his breathing has increased, his fists clenched so tightly it turned his knuckles white. He was tired of this, tired of being called a toy, a plastic toy who follows every order. More words shot out of him. 

He was angry.

“In case you aren’t aware, you have NO right to talk to me like that!”

The officer merely drank his coffee, giving him a dead stare. “Yeah, and your point?”

“We’re supposed to be equals!”

The officer laughed. “You think I’m going to listen to some fucking thing the government is saying?! They're a joke! That little display those androids pulled was a riot!” 

Connor’s hands flung onto the officer’s jacket. “YOU THOUGHT THEM RISKING THEIR OWN LIVES WERE FUNNY?!”

**Error. Error. Error. System overpowering. Error. Error.**

Red flashed in his vision, his ears fading to static. He was screaming, he knew this, he could feel his throat straining, but he couldn’t hear the words. There was nothing but static. Suddenly, he was grabbed, the android was torn away from the officer, who was now scared out of his mind. Connor only tried to fight, his LED now blinking a hard on red. 

**System overpowering. System overpowering. System overpowering.**

**Emergency shutdown initiated.**

**Powering down.**

O0O

When Connor opened his eyes, he realized he was in his chair again still at the police station.

**Stabilizing. . . . Stabilization complete.**

He sat up in his seat, his eyes feeling heavy. His body felt heavy. His hands were shaking. What happened..? Then, he remembered. He was angry. 

There it was. The word he was looking for.

Anger. 

Was he angry? That was what anger felt like? He flinched at the sudden pain in his head and he placed a hand there, his LED flashing yellow. He never wanted to be angry again. That was awful. But, it seemed the damage was done because before he knew it, he was called into the chief’s office and sat down, shrinking under the chief hard stare. 

“Connor, what the fuck was that?” He demanded. “Do you have any IDEA what you could have caused?!”

It took him a moment to notice Hank next to him and he glanced at him. Hank didn’t glance back. He could have tried to bust his ass out for him which Connor concluded it didn’t go too well. It only made him squirm in his seat. 

“No.” He answered, looking down like a child getting scolded. 

“You nearly clawed Officer Charles’ eyes out! What the fuck is with you today, Connor?!”

Connor has guessed Hank told him everything. He swallowed and he looked up at him. “I don’t know, Chief.”

The Chief blinked at him. “What do you mean?”

“I-I just don’t know… I was… Angry.”

“Yeah, we know that part, Connor,” Hank muttered next to him. “But why?”

Connor’s brain froze. Why was he angry? He didn’t know. He couldn’t have known. But he did know. His words were caught. How could he explain something like this? 

“Well… I… I just… I don’t like being treated like that. I kind of just woke up like this.”

The chief sighed and leaned back in his chair. “Connor, if you were Hank or someone else, I would have exploded. But you… You're still… How do I put this? You're still learning.”

Connor looked down, feeling ashamed. His face flushed. He was still learning how to be like one of them. He never imagined it would be so hard, all he had to do was do his work and keep quiet but even then, that didn’t work. He wanted to explain himself but the only few words that squeezed out of him were, “I’m sorry Chief.”

He felt the expression on Chief’s face soften. “That’s alright. Everyone has bad days. But if you ever pull something like that again, you're going to get a firm talking to, man to man, you understand?”

Connor only nodded, not looking up at him. 

“Dismissed.”

O0O

Connor glanced at Officer Charles from across the office, guilt spreading to his face. Hank noticed and looked up from his paperwork.

“You going to go apologize to him, or what?” He said.

Connor glanced at him. “I-I just feel bad, Lieutenant.”

“Understandable…” Hank sighed. “Charles can be... A bit of a dick, but, I'm sure he got the message after you almost clawed the fucker’s eyes out.” He yawned then, closing the folder. “I’m beat, want to head out to grab something to eat?”

Connor nodded, his LED glowing a soft yellow. Both closing down their monitors, they got out of their seats and as Hank made his way to the exit, Connor was slower. He couldn’t miss saying sorry to Officer Charles. Slowing his steps, he took a glance at him, before he turned and quickly went up to him. Charles still wasn’t fazed, the officer blinking up at him as he stood there.

Taking a deep breath, Connor spoke, “I’m sorry for how I acted earlier, Officer Charles.”

Charles scoffed and glanced away. “Whatever... Don’t you have somewhere to be…?”

Connor didn’t feel angry anymore. His systems felt… relieved. He nodded and then, he went out the door to follow Hank to his car. 

He never noticed Gavin watching him go, a smile on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Yes, this fanfic is still going! I'm sorry, I wasn't sure where I was going with this but, I decided to stick with the anger route, my next chapter is going to be much longer then this one~.


	4. Joy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor teaches Hank how to flip a coin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter will be short, yet sweet~. ;3c

_Ping. Ping Ping._

Hank glared at Connor, watching the android flick the coin up and down, up and down, each flick landing perfectly back on the palm of his hand. Connor was always so focused with that coin, always staring off into the distance as he fiddled around with it. It always raised questions with Hank and with a sip of his drink, he asked.

“Why do you always play with that coin Connor?” 

Connor blinked from his trance, looking at Hank, his fidgeting not stopping. Now the android fiddled the coin on the fingers, the coin rolling from side to side on his knuckles. 

“I’m not sure, Lieutenant. It calms me in a way.” He answered.

“Calms you? Like, what is that….” Hank scratched his head, thinking of the word. “What those kids do… Ehm…”

“A stim?”

“Yeah, that.”

Connor searched through his database for the proper definition of stim, he repeated it. “Self-stimulatory behavior, also known as stimming and self-stimulation, is the repetition of physical movements, sounds, or repetitive movement of objects.”

Hank chuckled. “Well look at you go slick, got anything else in that brain of yours you wish to define?”

Connor thought about it. “Well, what do you want to know, Lieutenant?”

Hank merely shrugged and leaned back on the couch. “I don’t know. I’m just wondering why you fiddle with that coin so much.”

Connor didn’t say anything, tossing his coin from side to side. Hank internally enjoyed watching Connor play with his coin, he’s expressing himself, something that was most human of all. Every day, he noticed Connor was becoming more in touch with the world, becoming more human, which was a damn good thing in his eyes. Back then, he used to despise Connor being around, but now, he enjoyed his company.

Sometimes, he even reminded him of Cole.

Hank smiled a bit and glanced at his beer bottle, the bottle was half empty. Then, he glanced back at Connor, feeling full. 

“Hey, Connor?”

Connor glanced up at him, now going back to balancing the coin on his knuckle. 

“Where did you learn to flip your coin like that?”

“I’m not sure, Lieutenant. I just picked up on it, I guess. But… I can teach you?”

Hank raised an eyebrow. “You want to teach me how to flip a coin?” 

Connor glanced down then, flipping the coin up one last time before holding it in his hand. “I’d like to.”

Hank scratched his head, mulling it over. Is he going to let an android teach him something? Hell, maybe this would be useful for him someday. He hasn’t been occupied with anything since Cole was alive. 

“Ah, fuck it. Teach me.” Hank sighed, putting his drink on the table. 

Connor blinked, his eyebrows raising. He glanced down at his coin for a moment, taking in that Hank was willing to be taught and he went over to him, sitting next to him on the couch. Reaching into his coat, he grabbed another coin and gave it to Hank, in which Hank questioned if he has been collecting coins behind his back. Politely declining, Connor began to talk to him about how to flip a coin.

Shifting his finger under the coin, he flicked it upwards, the coin falling back into his hand. Allowing Hank to try, Hank launched the coin away from his hand, cursing under his breath as he went to go get it. After a few attempts and better explaining, Connor watched as Hank successfully landed his first coin flip, a smile tugging at his lips. Over and over again, he watched as Hank landed his flips and a feeling filled Connor's chest. This feeling spread from his head to his toes and now he was excited to teach him more.

He felt happiness. He felt pure joy rush through his veins.

“I noticed you tried to do my passing trick back at the tower,” Connor said, his smile brighter than before. “Do you want me to teach you? I must warn you though, it’s more complicated than just a simple flip.”

Hank smirked at him. “You saw, huh? All right then, teach me!”

Connor’s face blushed deeply and he chuckled. The rest of the night, Connor and Hank practiced coin tricks, tricks of various difficulties and techniques to achieve them.

Hank snores soundly on the couch, drink back in his hand, with Connor flipping his coin next to him, his bright smile still on his face.


	5. Gratitude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor makes Hank breakfast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was another tricky one to write. I thought about which emotion to use for this one, that being disgust, acceptance, and grief. I began to write about the emotion disgust but I quickly scrapped it for not sounding and/or reading right. So here! Take another fluffy moment of father and son!

Sunlight streamed through the blinds, Connor having pulled them open slightly. He glanced at Hank with a smile, going into the kitchen to cook. 

He always wanted to give gratitude for Hank after everything he’s done for him, but how, he wasn’t sure. Until now. 

Gratitude. 

He coined the term in his head every now and then. Now, finally finding the right word, he started to plot on a way to give back to Hank, as a way of saying thank you. 

Turning on the stove, he glanced around for a pan of some kind. Going through the cupboards (and making quite a racket while doing so) he found the pan he needed. With a clatter, he opened up the fridge and pulled out a carton of eggs and a package of bacon. Connor never cooked before, only ever tagging along with Hank when they go out to eat (which was almost always). He observed Hank cook once in a while, however, he was somewhat clumsy with his cooking. 

Cracking open an egg, the egg sizzling as it came in contact with the hot pan. Connor smiled to himself, already pleased. His heart fluttered as he worked, wondering if Hank would like it or if he was cooking it right. Androids were built in with these features, cooking is no exception. Their database was like a cookbook, storing many ingredients and recipes. Connor may have been a part of the DPD, but he was built the same as any other android was. 

Rolling up his sleeves, Connor began to stir the eggs, while glancing at the bacon every now and then. His meal in mind was scrambled eggs with a side of bacon, a very simple dish. Connor really wasn’t an expert cook (yet) so starting with a simple recipe such as this is a start. Stirring the eggs to a liquid form, Connor dug around for another pan and plopped the thin slabs of bacon onto it, the bacon beginning to sizzle and pop from the heat. 

Scents of eggs and bacon filled the air. Sumo came over, his tongue lolling out, and sat next to Connor, watching as the android cook for the lieutenant. Connor glanced at Sumo and with a smile, patted the dog on the head. With the timer in his head going off, the food was done. Pulling a plate out, Connor dipped the now scrambled eggs on top with the bacon ever so neatly on the side (without trying to burn himself). 

He was proud of his work, if he was ever human, he would be eating this proud meal himself. But… He wasn’t, which he didn’t mind at all. He was human in his own way, which Hank showed him. Another reason he was grateful to have him. 

Connor began to set up the table, Sumo still staring at the plate in his hand. Affection… He was fond of Hank. Was this love? No… It couldn’t have been. Can androids even feel love? More importantly, can HE feel love? Will he be able to find a partner in his life he would love for now and forever more? Moving the condiments around, he heard the tired footsteps of the lieutenant. Connor glanced over his shoulder and smiled shyly as his presentation was done. 

“Good morning, Lieutenant.” He said and stepped back, intertwining his hands together. He tried not to look nervous.

Hank blinked away sleep and glanced at the table. “What the fuck is all this?”

Connor blushed. “I made breakfast for you…”

Hank raised an eyebrow and sat at the table, staring at his dish. Then, he glanced up at Connor with a smile. “Scrambled eggs with bacon?”

Connor nodded shyly. “I-I… I just wanted to say thank you, lieutenant…”

Hank slipped a clump of eggs in his mouth and he chuckled lightly. “For what?”

Connor smiled. There it was, Hank’s familiar attitude. He made his way to the other side of the table and sat down, eyeing Hank as he ate. He noticed Hank was quite pleased with his meal, which made Connor’s smile grow.

“How is it, Lieutenant?” He asked.

Hank nodded. “It’s good… Have you ever made food before?”

Connor shook his head. “No… First time. I started with a simple recipe since it’s one of the easiest to start with. I’m no cook.” 

“Well, this tastes like something my wife would have made…” Hank’s smile vanished then. “She was a wonderful cook.”

Connor’s smile vanished also. He stared at Hank, watching as he forked up clumps of egg and chewed. He began to ponder how he could change this all around, anything to keep his Lieutenant in high spirits. He could try and spill what was on his mind, telling Hank how thankful he was to have him, but would Hank really appreciate that? Connor fumbled with his hands now, thinking of a solution.

“You know Connor… I’m glad I met you…” 

Connor looked up then, noticing Hank smile again. 

“You surprise me every chance you get. Every day, you're showing me more and more that your human. That means something to me. I always hated your kind but… I've been coming to understand and accept you all for who you are.” 

Now, it was Connor’s turn to speak. 

“I-I’m grateful I met you, Hank. I’m glad that you accepted me for who I am. I’m grateful you’ve let me stay with you. I’m grateful that you're helping me along the way with finding myself... “ Connor sighed. “I’m glad that I’m still your partner.”

“Oh stop… I didn’t do anything.”

“But you did.”

“Not at all.”

Hank chomped on the last of his bacon and rubbed his chin with his arm. He sighed and leaned back. His plate was cleaned out, much to Connor’s happiness. The Android got up and took his plate, now putting it in the sink. 

“...Do androids even eat?” He heard Hank ask as Connor turned on the facet. 

“No. We don’t have the capabilities of eating. Not yet, anyway.” He answered. 

“...What happens if you do eat?”

Connor looked over his shoulder at him. “There will be a system error and we shut down.” 

Hank made a face and sat up. “Like food gets stuck in you?”

“Yes.” 

Hank sighed. “Well, that sucks… I would have done you the same thing you did for me!”

Connor looked back at his plate, grabbing the dish soap. “You don’t have to, Lieutenant. I know how grateful you are to have me…”

Hank chuckled then, getting up. “Without you, I would be dead.” 

Connor paused his cleaning, watching him walk away to his room. He remembered that day, the day where he found Hank unconscious and that he broke in to save him. When he looked around after Hank woke up, he realized he had suicidal tendencies. He kept this information stored in the back of his mind but sometimes on days like this, he forgot he even had suicidal thoughts. 

“Where are you going, Lieutenant?” Connor called to him, turning off the warm water and grabbing a rag. 

“Getting dressed, the fuck you think I’m doing?” Hank replied back. 

Connor internally sighed in relief and begun to focus on getting the dish clean. Over and under and all around, he placed the dish on the drying rack and gently folded the rag next to the sink. Sumo tilted his head at him, Connor smiling and began to pet him once more, waiting for Hank. 

Soon enough, Hank stepped out in his familiar attire and ran a hand through his thick white hair. “All right, you ready?”

Connor looked up at him and stood. “Yes.”

And with those words, the two set off towards Hank’s car. Light rain fell, sprinkling Connor’s coat with little dots. Climbing in, Hank’s car rumbled to life and pulled out the driveway. 

The two chatted up a storm all the way there.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I have a drabble collection coming to you guys! I'm so obsessed with this game right now and I just had to write something for it, here, I'm writing about Connor and his emotions. 
> 
>  
> 
> If your wondering about my playthrough, I got the peaceful ending, where androids now have equal rights to humans while also getting the good Hank and Connor ending! Note: this story will go into many directions, this will be just a drabble fic so just expect angst and fluff and what not. 
> 
> Also, another thing I must add: I do not ship Hank and Connor together. I more see them as a father/son team, hence me tagging them as such! I'll update the tags as I go as well.
> 
> Enjoy!~


End file.
